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Authors > W Wik > W. C. Fields

21-30 Quotations of 137

W. C. Fields quotes

American Comic and Actor, 1880-1946

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“Women are like elephants. I like to look at 'em, but I wouldn't want to own one.”

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“I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”

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“Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.”

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“Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.”

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“I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.”

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“Children should neither be seen or heard from -- ever again.”

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“Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.”

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“Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.”

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“I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.”

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“It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.”

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